Subject's name: Pretty much just Ghost

Subject's powers: Invisibility, intangibility

Why these powers seem good: You could phase through the walls of the women's locker room, then hang out in there and see all the naked chicks without anybody seeing you! It'd be so sweet, bro! Soooooo sweet!

Also, you'd have the most hilarious punchline ever if you ate the pie in the kitchen that was supposed to be for your mother-in-law. Your wife would be all like, "Did you eat this pie?!?" and then you'd just turn invisible and walk through the wall. The live studio audience will love that shit!

Why they might actually suck: Here's the problem with invisibility: Everything you do, you're not going to get the credit for it. You could sneak right into the Pentagon and steal all their super-secret stealth tank, and nobody would know. That is bullshit.

As for intangibility, the trouble is that you always seem to turn tangible at the worst fucking time, like when you're halfway through a wall or the Black Widow's got her hand in the middle of your chest. That is just the worst.

The. Worst.