Profiles in Superpowers That Seem Good But Might Actually Suck: Multiple Santa

by King Oblivion, Ph.D.

Subject's name: Unknown

Subject's powers: Can channel electricity into clones of himself

Why this power seems good: Well, for one thing, it's better than the alternative reaction most people have to being electrocuted. Plus, it would be really handy to have hundreds of versions of yourself to do shit like robbing banks and organizing your stocking caps for you.

Why it might actually suck: It would really be terrible if those versions of you were exceptionally stupid, though, as Multiple Santa's are. It's all you can do to even get them to walk in a straight line. Plus, they're exceptionally sensitive. All the Tick's got to do is give them a little noogie and they short out like a cheap blender. And you wouldn't even be able to pull that cool trick where you fool the hero into thinking the other ones are you, because of that big brown M on your chest! Goddamn electrocution!

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