Taco Bell has pulled off one of the craziest evil schemes we've seen in our long history of villainy. Get this: They have somehow convinced people that eating Taco Bell's drive-thru food is healthy:
Incredible. (Seriously, it totally lacks credibility. Especially since the spokeswoman's name has "dough" in it.)
But this lady's story is just the tip of the iceberg. After the jump, Taco Bell takes their plan...to the next level.
0:07: "This parody is fictional and for dramatization purposes only." That seems like a lot of kinda-synonyms to throw into one sentence.
0:18: Is "car" a concept people are so unfamiliar with that they really needed to demonstrate what one is with a horn? Twice?
0:32: Oh, I see. The car horn's just in there to annoy the shit out of the audience. Okay.
0:49: This video should win some kind of award for talking down to its audience.
1:08: So how long before they start doin' it? We can all see the tension.
1:15 - 1:20: "When I decided to trim down, I knew I had to be realistic with myself. I didn't want to cut out my fast food." I don't think they could make a robot whose head wouldn't explode hearing those two sentences back-to-back.
1:24: "Other sensible choices" = stomach stapling
1:45: You'll notice that, as soon as she started talking about Taco Bell, they cut away from the dietician. This is so you can't see the gun to her head.
2:13: "Great taste" is not something anyone has ever enjoyed at Taco Bell.
2:31: This chauffeur has been paid to appear in the commercial and even he don't believe this shit.
2:44: Hold it. HOLD UP. The food in the Taco Bell drive-thru diet is Taco Bell food? I have been misinformed!
2:50: Hurry up, you two! You've only got 12 seconds to get fuckin'!
2:55: OH THANK YOU FOR THAT LAST HORN HONK YOU ASSHOLE
Comments
I think that was Pavlov's car horn or something. Every time I hear a car horn, I will want to kill someone. God forbid I honk my horn since that suggests I'll be behind the wheel of a potential death machine at that very moment.
Posted by: Spleeny | January 26, 2010 10:44 PM
I want to tie the Batman up, make him listen to this a hundred times, and see what happens. It will be bloody. Hehehe...
Posted by: The Evil Giggler | February 1, 2010 7:44 PM